The Energy You Are Sending Out

If you’re sitting in a chair slouching, hunched over with your arms crossed, head down, and you’re speaking in a flat, monotone voice while making zero eye contact, you’re not going to inspire anybody. When you believe that you are dull and your ideas are bland, that’s what you’ll project, and that’s what people will feel. It’s almost like talking to a mirror, except instead of seeing your image, it’s your energy and beliefs that are being reflected back to you. Based on the energy you are sending out, it’s clear that you don’t care about what you’re saying, and therefore, no one is going to listen to you or take you seriously. So, flip the prophecy around and project the energy that you want your audience to reflect. If you hype yourself up and show interest in what you’re speaking about, you will be amazed at how it changes others’ perceptions of you. When I discovered this idea and started putting effort into implementing it, it was almost magical. If you’re rocking confident body language, your eyes are bright and attentive, and your voice is filled with liveliness and positivity, people will see that not only are you enjoying yourself, but you also believe your ideas are valuable and exciting. As a result, your audience will be far more engaged and interested in what you have to say, and you’ll be able to capture and hold their attention more than ever before. This is a delightful feedback loop. The more you speak with this uplifting energy, the more people will be excited to listen to you. The more people are excited to listen to you, the more excited you will be to speak.

What In The World

And the more excited you are to speak, the more you will speak up instead of staying silent. Have you ever got the urge to say something, started thinking about all the things that could go wrong and ended up never saying a word? When your gut tells you to speak up, you must do so within five seconds. If you pause for any longer, your fears and insecurities will rise and smother any chance of you taking action. Your overactive brain can be the main thing holding you back, so don’t allow it to stop you. This is a simple but effective way to allow yourself to speak up before letting your brain censor your ideas. Make it your goal to apply this rule at least once every meeting. The longer it goes on, the more you’re giving your anxiety and uncertainty the chance to grow from a small dribble into a raging storm, and the harder it will be to join the discussion. Sometimes, we think waiting will give us more time to build courage, but instead, it usually gives us more time to think of reasons not to say anything. To ensure that you contribute to the meeting, make a point of talking during the first 15 minutes. The idea is that after you’ve opened your mouth once, you’ll find it easier to do it again. You certainly want to be the superhero of your own story, if you’re particularly timid and need a speaking up stepping stone, you can start out by playing the sidekick. If you have a close colleague who’s a natural communicator, ask them to be your superhero and pull you into the discussion by asking you easy questions.

Room At The Top

Get them to ask you questions like Do you agree? or Do you have anything to add? If you’re just starting out and are still working through your shyness, it’s completely okay to respond with a smile and a simple Yes. Everyone starts somewhere, and this can be a nice way to dip your feet into the shallow end. And for those of you who are already the Batman in your communication journey, keep an eye out for the Robins who could use your help. That being said, if you’re reading this and are insisting you have nothing to share right now, I’ll offer some alternative strategies on how you can speak up for the time being. Let’s start applying what you learned. Begin by setting a goal of how many times you will speak in each meeting. If you never talk in meetings, you can start with an achievable goal of one time and choose whatever way of speaking up you find easiest. When I started working on this many years ago as a quiet and fearful young man, the easiest thing to do was ask a question because I didn’t have to think of any new ideas or spend time explaining anything. Even throwing in a quick I agree or That’s a great point is a win if you’ve never talked before. Small wins add up, and they give you the confidence to keep going. Before each meeting, practice your intentional breathing techniques to relax you and optimize your state of mind. When the meeting begins, do your best to speak within the first 15 minutes, and use the 5 second rule to help with your hesitation.

Failure Is A Bend In The Road

If you’re in the early stages of your communication adventure, your main goal is first to conquer any urge you might have to stay quiet. You can even sneak in a couple of silent physiological sighs throughout the meeting for extra hits of stress relief. Additionally, remember to think about how your audience might respond to your ideas, and practice what you’ll say in return. Depending on the flow of the meeting, you may not always get to mention everything you planned for, and that’s okay. Regardless of what happens, preparing in this manner will set you up to speak confidently and intelligently in every meeting. If you’ve gotten to the point where you are speaking up quite often, your goal is now to increase the quality of your input rather than the quantity. Unless you’re giving a presentation, you never want to be the one doing most of the talking during a meeting.